you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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