dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
