I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
