I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I don't think brook has ever known best
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Randomize
