hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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