New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
you will always have a special place in my vag
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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