Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
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