i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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