living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
