I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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