when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
