When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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