Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
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