Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
