covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
