you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
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