whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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