Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
