We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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