Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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