I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
