yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize