Texts From Last Night

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  (812): View more from Indiana

  she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.

  (1-812): View more from Indiana

  thatta girl

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  (812): she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga. (1-812): thatta girl http://tfl.nu/kona
  Replies (28) Good night (5064) Bad night (1157)
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  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.

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  (339): He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning. http://tfl.nu/40hx
  Replies (10) Good night (2209) Bad night (5475)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  fair is fair

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  (610): we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it (484): fair is fair http://tfl.nu/tm5x
  Replies (21) Good night (6064) Bad night (1034)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course

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  (720): At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course http://tfl.nu/67cn
  Replies (25) Good night (5076) Bad night (1013)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough

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  (630): We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough http://tfl.nu/a8j7
  Replies (4) Good night (2777) Bad night (1209)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!

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  (740): Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE! http://tfl.nu/i7pp
  Replies (14) Good night (4490) Bad night (904)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable

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  (612): Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable http://tfl.nu/0g8x
  Replies (3) Good night (1697) Bad night (676)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina

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  (313): I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina http://tfl.nu/zo54
  Replies (5) Good night (2915) Bad night (670)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him

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  (602): just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him http://tfl.nu/vcwf
  Replies (9) Good night (772) Bad night (1218)
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Ugh he's texting me.

  (1-204): View more from Manitoba

  Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.

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  (204): Ugh he's texting me. (1-204): Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess. http://tfl.nu/6r54
  Replies (5) Good night (1528) Bad night (553)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.

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  (509): No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry. http://tfl.nu/k8f0
  Replies (5) Good night (439) Bad night (1055)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!

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  (901): You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?! http://tfl.nu/9kiq
  Replies (5) Good night (1078) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.

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  (405): I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow. http://tfl.nu/lb44
  Replies (2) Good night (476) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.

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  (530): He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette. http://tfl.nu/s1hb
  Replies (3) Good night (242) Bad night (466)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.

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  (612): Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument. http://tfl.nu/0nxh
  Replies (5) Good night (706) Bad night (184)

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