Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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