I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
