Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
