It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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