guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize