She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
