I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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