I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
