so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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