worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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