So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
