we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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