Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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