I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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