I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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