I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
