you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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