you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize
