You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize