tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize