ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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