Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
