Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
