somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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