come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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