Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
