I wish my penis had an off switch
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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